Monday, May 14, 2007
How I miss that face..
the smile that forms across your face when I call your name.
The one that I've always wanted...
is only you.
I'll keep trying til I get you,
I'll keep trying til you tell me to stop.
Don't say those words..
those comforting words that makes me want to fall into your arms...
right into your embrace.
But I know I can never be the one..
yet I still try and try and try...
I don't know why.
Perhaps its the way you look at me,
I feel so free.
I feel this over and over,
countless,
everytime.
With you by my side,
I'm high on life,
I wouldn't stop this feeling.
I wouldn't.
cos you mean so much to me,
you're the air that i breathe.
i don't want to sweet talk you,
but you should know that all along,
i've always...
always loved you.
9:27 AM
Monday, April 30, 2007
There's no use looking back, but I did last night.
I came across our old photographs and memories of love. I remember the very first pair of rings we used to have..you bought them. You gave it to me when I felt sick and I wanted to get better for us. Then came the second pair..I bought them and we wore til the silver coatings fell off and it looked rather rugged.
And things fell apart from there..
I hate looking back.
It hurts the current one.
I hate myself I hate myself when I see you.
When I see you outside, feelings starts to rush back. Feelings I once had for you before. Though not as strong, but it's still there. When I go to certain places, I have to hide away...scared to bump into you but at the same time I wanna see you cos I miss you so much and I had no damn idea why you left. Until now I'm still clueless.......but what's the point of dwelling in the past right. What's done is done. What's yours isn't mine no more.. =/
Sigh..whatever luh.
I'm going to bed...
8:53 PM
Thursday, April 26, 2007
~doorfromheaven 16 hours 23 minutes ago
la la la...what to say...hmm...well thanks for the fave...I guess that's a good start. Hmm, what else....
You're amazingly talented...but you probably already knew that. Uhm...hmm...
Meh, you're just incredible. I'll leave it at that. -runs away-Wow. I think goin on deviantart makes my day. I feel flattered, not proud. So darn flattered. I think my writings aren't that good.
Stayed back in school for lunch with Donna today. Ate, talked til her mom came. I didn't wanna go home so I went to the library to study. Revised chem..got distracted by a poetry book. Borrowed. Sat down and started revising again. An hour later, I ended up writing two poems. Kill me..for my short attention span. =.=
I was freezing my ass off in the library..couldn't take it no more so I went home instead. Sigh...tomorrow's English mid year. I'm scared.
How? =(
4:39 PM
Friday, April 20, 2007
TGIF!
- shakes head -
I refuse to do this week's friday five..so I'm doing last week's one instead.
Got back from Donna's place not long ago. Thanks for the talk. (:
Of course, not forgetting the staircase escape we had..like twice. Yeah. Stupid right? What the...but it's funny. Right Donna??? =D
1. Who was your first crush?Stephen Adinata...that was back in Pri 2..
2. Are you an introvert or an extrovert?80% extrovert, 20% introvert can?
3. What is your favorite non-sexual thing you like to do with the love of your life?Have a cup of coffee and read a book, just relax...life's too good to worry about.... =P
4. Name one quirky habit your partner does that either annoys you or makes you grin.Erm..I'll just name one thing from the past; the way she sneezes and makes a funny sound after. WAHAHAHHA!
5. Do you believe in monogamous relationships?Why not? You mean..you people...share? =/
10:41 PM
TGIF!
- shakes head -
I refuse to do this week's friday five..so I'm doing last week's one instead.
Got back from Donna's place not long ago. Thanks for the talk. (:
Of course, not forgetting the staircase escape we had..like twice. Yeah. Stupid right? What the...but it's funny. Right Donna??? =D
1. Who was your first crush?Stephen Adinata...that was back in Pri 2..
2. Are you an introvert or an extrovert?80% extrovert, 20% introvert can?
3. What is your favorite non-sexual thing you like to do with the love of your life?Have a cup of coffee and read a book, just relax...life's too good to worry about.... =P
4. Name one quirky habit your partner does that either annoys you or makes you grin.Erm..I'll just name one thing from the past; the way she sneezes and makes a funny sound after. WAHAHAHHA!
5. Do you believe in monogamous relationships?Why not? You mean..you people...share? =/
10:41 PM
Spinning: A1 - One last song
Feeling...lovesick
I finally have a moment for myself for a couple of minutes now. Here I am, sitting myself down in front of this screen, posting about my day.
I remember the countless times I tried to be where you are, at the places I think I know you will be. I remember the exact same emotion I had for you back then...except it's much stronger now. I remember the very first time we met. I'll never forget that. Never ever.School's alright. Gotta study like insane for MYE or else...nevermind. I'll not think about failing...I don't wanna be another letdown..yet again. No, not this time round. I've come way too far to give it all up yeah.
I miss you. Miss seeing you already. It's been a couple of hours.
Can I chase you all over again?
4:33 PM
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
In my mind, I'm happily waving goodbye to my sketchbook.
But here I am, taking a break from art. Been drawing ever since I got home. Had dinner and then math tuition. Then started again and I couldn't take it..needed a break. 3 down, 1 more to go. I know it sounds easy, it's just drawing right? Well, easier said than done.
Thinking back of the countless times I broke down because of art..I feel silly. So stupid. Since when did I become so weak? Since when did I give up so easily without fighting for it? Yeah okay, so if I were to confide in people about it...they'll most probably go ' poor dear, just hang on for a little bit more. you're almost there. the next thing you know, it's over and you can have a long holiday. '
Yeah, another...easier said than done.
The truth is, those supposedly ' comforting words ' don't exactly console me that much yeah.
Sigh...either that....or I'm just over paranoid over art that I'm pissing people off cos I'm pissed off and I'm taking it out on them.
Aiyah, easy...just leave me alone and I'll be fine. Stop trying to comfort me cos it makes me feel like I'm leashed on to you. thanks.
9:43 PM
Saturday, April 14, 2007
Clouds above go sailing by
I found my meaning in this life
clear white is flying in my eyes,
underneath a blue, blue sky
The waves come rolling in with the tide.
I've been away too long
and everyday I missed you more.
You look like you did before
only prettier more attractive.
Everyday I love you more.
I feel so...nostalgic.
That's for someone. ( donna should know who i'm talkin abt ) I woke up feeling like I'm living my past all over again. Just this morning...just for this morning.
I've never stopped feeling.Sigh..okok....enough. =/
8:34 AM
Thursday, April 12, 2007
HI BINKSY!
Okie binksy, so somehow you've stumbled upon my blog / blogs. Keep it as a secret yeah?
Thou shalt not reveal my secret. Pinkie swear? Perfect.
Now now, I'm missing Kohji pretty badly.
Tien and I were talking about those lucky people who get to spend time with Kohji, who cherishes him and all. Ah...hate this feeling. =(
- pouts big big -
Crazy weather = crazy me
Insane weather drives me up the wall and now I'm extremely stressed up over art homework. It's not like every other day I can / feel like / want to draw. Hor? - huge sigh -
ZZZ. I CANNOT WAIT TIL THE DAY I GET TO WATCH PHANTOM OF THE OPERA. I REALLY CANNOT WAIT. I'M SO EXCITED I HAVE TO TYPE THIS IN CAPS. Oh well, binks, glad I have you to talk to. Oh wait, did I reply binksy's msg just now? DIE. SHIT. Means I let binksy go home without having a topic to talk about?! Binksy...sure...bored...to..death. Right binks? =P
Binksy thinks I'm spastic.
I think binksy's spastic too loh.
ANYWAY, I think I better log off and continue sketching....sigh..
what a life.......
